That title is a little misleading, I’ll admit, but during my latest library book reading journey (yes, a library book, my dentist acted like I was holding an ancient artifact – “is that a…library book?” he asked) – excuse that digression – I came across Mel Robbins and her 5 Second Rule (The 5 Second Rule: Transform your Life, Work, and Confidence with Everyday Courage). In a nutshell, she claims that whatever your goals are, your fear to act, your anxiety, all can be helped by the 5 Second Rule. (And it has nothing to do with the rule of eating something off the floor within five seconds.)

It’s simple to do, whenever you’re faced with procrastination (to exercise, work on a project, get out of bed) or if you’re afraid to act upon an impulse (introduce yourself to a new person, speak up in a meeting or in class, ask for a raise) you start a countdown of 5-4-3-2-1, then physically move in some way, and do the thing! She writes, “Legendary psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi applied this concept to human behavior, blaming activation energy as one of the reasons why making change is so hard. He defines activation energy as that ‘initial huge push of energy’ that is required to change whether it’s to get a stalled car to move forward or yourself out of a warm bed in the morning.”

According to Robbins, the countdown and physical movement interrupts the part of your brain that is unmotivated, afraid, or stuck and will create that “activation energy” to start whatever you’re avoiding. For her, it began with just getting out of bed in the morning. She was in a tough life situation being unemployed, her husband’s restaurant businesses were doing poorly, they were deep in debt, and had two young children. She avoided life each day by hitting the snooze button multiple times every morning, then she would rush out of bed at some point, get her kids to school late, and start a stressful day of not facing her problems, ending with alcohol in the evenings to block it all out. She lived this way for a long time and beat herself up about it. But after seeing a rocket take off on TV and hearing the countdown, she did that to herself the next morning – counted down from 5 to 1 then leapt out of bed.

For her, that small step proved to herself that she could do it, and she slowly started using the 5 Second Rule in all areas of her life: to find a job, to face their debt, to cut down on self-medicating her problems away, and to work on her goals. According to Robbins, she changed her entire life by using the Rule. She says, “What I discovered is powerful: pushing yourself to take simple actions creates a chain reaction in your confidence and your productivity.”

In the book, there is testimonial after testimonial about how the Rule has helped thousands of people accomplish their goals, move past fear to move forward in life, fulfill unreachable desires, or quit a bad habit. She writes, “That’s the power of everyday courage. When your heart speaks, honor it, 5- 4- 3- 2- 1- and move. One moment of courage can change your day. One day can change your life.”

As usual, however, that is easier said than done, but according to her, that little initial action will start a chain reaction. I tried it and it did help get me get off my butt and do things I didn’t feel like doing. But, of course, my brain found a workaround and negotiated not starting the countdown because I would have to get moving once I did. I guess she would tell me to stop doing that before I even start, but it is hard to change. I read her book over a month ago and have conveniently forgotten that the Rule even exists many times since. Still, if I remind myself, it really can help, not only procrastination, but with anxious thoughts too.

Robbins was extremely afraid of flying for most of her life, but realized that if she applied the Rule once an anxious thought entered, then physically moved her body to interrupt her brain, along with picturing an “anchoring thought,” a future scene she was looking forward to (for example, flying home to her family and picturing them all eating dinner together once she got back), she was able to beat this overwhelming fear. She says she doesn’t even think about her flying worries anymore. “Everyday life is full of moments that are scary, uncertain, and difficult. Facing these moments and unlocking the opportunity, magic, and joy in your life requires tremendous courage.” For her, the 5 Second Rule forced her to face those moments and in doing so, found herself being courageous. “The more that you practice acts of courage, the more that you will believe you are in control of your life, and as a result, the more confident that you will become. Even when what you need to do scares you to death, the Rule helps you take courageous action.”

So, give it a try the next time you’re faced with uncertainty, procrastination, or just plain old laziness, and let me know if it works for you. In the meantime, I will 5-4-3-2-1 myself onto my next task.

Your first question after reading the title above might be, HOW? Who cares about all the details, the answer to HOW is the most pressing. So, short answer – eat within a designated set of hours, go to bed and wake up at decent times (without the assistance of a screen), and moderately exercise. There you go, it’s that easy! Or is it?

I recently finished the book The Circadian Code by Satchin Panda, PhD, a professor and researcher of biological studies. According to him and his many hours of research (along with others), he has studied the positive and negative effects that occur when we live within or outside of our circadian rhythms. He says all animals (humans included) have three: eating, sleeping, and activity. And living according to them is better for your health overall, including maintaining or losing weight, and getting beneficial sleep.

The first, eating, means you maintain all of your meals within a Time Restricted Eating (TRE) schedule. (Some may know this as intermittent fasting.) With TRE, the goal is to consume everything within 8-12 hours. That means from your first bite or sip in the morning to your last in the evening, except for water or herbal tea (others think black coffee and unsweetened creamer not exceeding fifty calories is acceptable in the morning before your first meal, but no nightcaps or that evening glass of wine, sorry).

Panda says the more you can restrict the time (to eight hours for example), the more weight you will lose. He has observed two people eating the same diet, one sticking to a TRE schedule and one not; the one with the schedule lost weight (even without a specific low calorie or low fat diet). This weight reduction happens over time, however, no ten-pound losses in a week, but as your body gets accustomed to this timeframe, you will start to shed pounds.

My husband started a new diet and exercise program, which involves eating specific types of food on different days (i.e. a low carb day, a macro day, etc), but a key part of the program is sticking to an eight-hour eating window. It has worked for him. He’s lost weight and inches, while gaining muscle (doing their targeted workouts). [Unfortunately, for someone like me who gets migraines from not eating for long periods of time, eight hours is unrealistic (I tried and got a migraine on two different occasions). I can do a 10-12 window fairly easily, however.]

Panda says that your stomach needs 12-13 hours of rest each night. During that fast, mostly while sleeping, your digestion slows and other important processes take place. Eating (or drinking anything but water) at night is especially bad for you because, as the author says, “the kitchen is closed,” and your gut is not prepared to start working again. As a result, that late night snack sits in your stomach until morning, often resulting in indigestion and acid reflux throughout the night.

The second circadian rhythm, that many of us know best, is sleeping. Besides the pain of jet lag or daylight savings, our bodies need a set number of scheduled hours of sleep each night (roughly 7-9) and it must be “quality sleep.” That means limited light exposure and few interruptions. Blue light from screens keeps our brains awake. They cause us to produce melanopsin instead of melatonin at night (the first is a light receptor in our eyes that wakes us up, the second is the hormone that induces sleep).

According to Panda, a full 7-8 hours of sleep a night is the time needed for the brain to do its work of storing memories and repairing itself. He recommends keeping devices out of the room, sticking to a schedule of similar bed/wake times, and wearing an eye mask if the sun wakes you up. Kids and teens especially need these important hours of sleep (and more for younger children) as their brains are rapidly developing.

The final part of the “code” is activity. Panda says that exercising before your first meal will burn body fat, not the meal you just ate. Doing so outside in the morning offers good sun exposure and wakes our brains up faster. As an added bonus, exercising will stave off hunger for a few hours, allowing you to fast a little longer. It also improves brain health (along with countless other benefits that I won’t list here).

So, to summarize Panda’s recommendations to “maintain a robust clock and maintain brain function,” as well as staying healthy, losing weight, and possibly sleeping better:

• Get adequate sleep (according to a predictable schedule) with limited light exposure
• Consume all meals within a time-restricted-eating schedule (TRE)
• Exercise
• Get exposure to daylight each day

I know that all four of those are often easier said than done, since our modern world complicates matters, but he says to start small and build from there. Good luck!

A new year brings people thinking about eating healthy again, since they completely stopped doing it during the holidays. I’m one of those people too. For the past three years some friends and I have done a cleanse at the start of January, which means cutting out everything you ever loved about eating. It can be torturous and grueling at times, but it does the job. It clears out the junk I’ve been consuming and the habits that started forming as I reached for another dessert, another glass of wine, another handful of chips… Once the cleanse is over, I am mostly in the groove of eating well again.

That was last Sunday and so far, I’m still doing pretty well. I haven’t gone back to my favorites for fear of starting some avalanche of eating those banned foods I had cut out for the last three weeks. But an article I recently read got me thinking. It was entitled “How I Ditched Dieting for Good,” and it was about the fairly new idea of eating intuitively. What does that mean? I wondered the same. Essentially, it’s means eating what your body wants, when it wants it. So, stopping all that “can’t have that, mustn’t have those,” thinking and just eat what you want. What?! This sounds too good to be true, right?

According to this article, and some blog posts, the idea is to trust yourself and your body about what you want to eat, and basically, eat it! Here are some guiding principles:

-Forget diets and diet culture, for many they are a short-term solution to a problem. You can do them and lose weight, but then soon go back to gaining it again.

-Use a Hunger-Fullness scale to judge when you are truly hungry. That means asking yourself if you are really hungry in that moment (or maybe you just need water), as well, as stopping when are comfortably full. Not sort of full and you’ll be hungry twenty minutes from now, or overly full so you’re lying on the couch moaning, actually nicely full.

-Eat what you really want. Ask yourself what you want to eat, and throw away the ideas of “this food is bad and that one is absolutely terrible for me” (which is hard since we’ve been so programmed over the years). Supposedly, if we just let ourselves have what we are craving, we will have a little of it, be satisfied then naturally choose something healthier (true? who knows).

-Eat mindfully. That means paying attention to what you are eating, slowing down, and really enjoying it. That also includes eating what your body craves, not what your emotions do. Scarfing down a carton of ice cream after a bad day is not the idea.

-Be nice to your body, regardless of its size. Part of what keeps us in the cycle of dieting and eating only certain foods is to change our bodies. Eating intuitively means accepting our bodies, regardless of what they look like.

The author of the article initially had a really difficult time throwing away the ideas of dieting or eating only “healthy foods,” but as time went on and she recognized the pre-programmed messages in her head, she let herself just eat what she wanted. She says that when she wanted peanut M&M’s she would have a few, not the whole bag, and be satisfied. She not only lost weight during this year-long experiment, but said the most significant change is that she doesn’t waste “mental energy agonizing over food or body size anymore.” She says she still stresses over potato chips sometimes, but she doesn’t guilt herself or “promise to make up for it.”

Too good to be true? I suppose it depends on your relationship with food. If you know you eat when you are stressed, depressed, angry, etc, then this probably isn’t the best for you because you can justify eating anything (unless you pay close attention and stop yourself, which is possible). I don’t think I’m ready to jump on this bandwagon yet, but it is definitely food for thought, especially on this snack-laden Super Bowl Sunday.

 

This January I embarked on the Arbonne 30-Days to Healthy Living Cleanse. I did this last year too and wrote about it (the Power and Pain of the 30-Day Cleanse). However, this year I was not alone. Somehow, I managed to talk others into doing it too (besides my husband who probably felt that he had little choice). Four other couples and two additional women did it with us, and oh, what fun it was!

For those who don’t know about this cleanse, the following foods are cut out for thirty days: wheat, sugar, dairy, peanuts, corn, soy, caffeine (except for green tea), canola oil (which is in many foods and is inflammatory), all vinegar except apple cider, pork, beef (except grass-fed, once a week), starchy foods (like potatoes), and sugary fruits (bananas, pineapple, etc). Why, you might ask, would anyone voluntarily cut out ALL of these foods? And, what does that leave a person to eat?!  I did this cleanse again because last year it helped with my migraines, my husband did it to lose weight (and he’s a nice, supportive guy in that way), it’s also a good way to get rid of the guilt-ridden pounds and general yuckiness felt after overindulging during the holiday season (which we both did). Those who joined us did it for a variety of reasons: for some it was to lose weight, others wanted to get rid of the guilt too, some wanted to get a good start on the year by eating right, and one other person had mysterious pain issues and wanted to see if a diet change would help alleviate some of the pain.

The cleanse did help with all of these issues. Everyone lost weight. My migraines improved. All of us felt “good” in general (either from not eating so crappy anymore or for paying penance from the month before, we don’t know), and the person who had the pain issue said her body felt better (though it didn’t all go away). If that’s the case, why don’t we eat like this ALL of the time, then? And here is where the list of drawbacks begins.

Convenience: it is extremely difficult, if not impossible, to eat out or grab something quick during this cleanse. No restaurant or quick eatery has entirely cleanse-compliant menu options (Chipotle is the one exception, and even then, there is one or two items on the menu to have). Meal-planning is essential, which was good in some ways because it forced me to plan, but for those of us who aren’t very creative or enjoy figuring out meals, it was hard. Which leads me to the next one:

Lack of variety: there are only so many ways to cook a chicken, especially when most marinades, vinegars, or any type of sauce is forbidden. I don’t eat meat, so it didn’t bother me, but others who did the cleanse groaned, “Chicken…again?” Grass-fed beef is an option, a very expensive one. Most chicken sausages have a pork casing. And for me, the vegetarian, beans – yet again – got pretty old. After it was over, though, we definitely appreciated some simple foods that we couldn’t have – regular old potatoes, for instance, or tofu in my case.

Missing out: many of us had certain foods or beverages that we realized were hard to let go of. For most it was the beloved coffee, but after the three to five days of withdrawal, many were okay (some weren’t). My nightly cookie with tea was dearly missed, or a Friday night beer (a glass of wine for others). How much of this was habit or actually hard to give up? We’re not sure.

The length of the cleanse got to me in the end. I was flying through it for the first two and a half weeks, finding that it wasn’t so hard because I had given up a lot of these foods anyway (mostly wheat, dairy, and coffee), but after fifteen days, I hit the wall – hard. I was tired of eating the same old things. I wanted chocolate. I wanted my old salad dressing back. I wanted to stop thinking about what to eat for the next week. I asked my husband why we ever decided to do this stupid cleanse (and he said, “I don’t know, why did you decide that we would do this stupid cleanse?”).

But we got through it, just like we did the first time. And, like before, we felt better – all of us did. Now, nearly a month has passed, and some of us are slowly going back to our old foods, others have dived in headfirst (with G.I. payback), and some have given up a few foods entirely. Last night, I asked most of the fellow cleansers if they would do it again, and many said yes. Despite the pain, the inconvenience, and the difficulty of following such a restrictive diet, we would do it again. (Well, I might change it to twenty days instead!). I think that shows how many of us knew we were making the right choices, filling our bodies with real food, and not feeling guilty for eating things that we knew satiated just our brains, not our stomachs. There must be something to that. I’ll let you know next year. Or would you care to join us? 😉

So many moms out there experience these debilitating headaches, and so many of us find little relief. For those of you who have never had a migraine, here is a brief description: extreme, throbbing pain, usually on one side the head, that is relentless. It pounds away minute by minute and is accompanied by heightened sensitivity to light, sound, and even smell. Almost anything will make it worse. Some experience nausea or vomit, some have a weird halo (or “aura”) that obscures their vision, others must hide away in a dark room, and the worst must go to the E.R. because the pain is so great. Most get no relief until they go to bed that night and hope it’s gone in the morning. For many sufferers, it has miraculously disappeared after a good night’s sleep; for others, it can continue for two to three more days. The pain can be so excruciating that most people are willing try anything to make it go away, and most things don’t work. Adding children to the mix (especially young and needy ones) when a migraine hits tests the strength of the strongest moms!

I have suffered from migraines since the age of 26 (I am now 42). I have researched the topic, tried almost any and every suggested remedy, gone to doctors, acupuncturists, and herbalists. Here is what I learned over the years to hopefully help anyone with these mega-headache blues:

Causes and Triggers:
Following are some common causes and triggers that contribute to a migraine occurring. Note that it isn’t just one of these that will cause the headache, it is typically a combination of them. I spent many years trying to find that one culprit, thinking that I could eliminate that and be cured; and it took me a long time to realize that it’s not the case. Too many triggers experienced at the same time will cause that dreaded pounding to start; there isn’t one source.
– Migraines are typically hereditary. If you get migraines and start asking around your family members, you’ll probably find that someone else gets them too. My dad does occasionally, as well as my aunt who experiences them often, and now my younger cousins. Unfortunately, we’re a migraine family, but they also have been a good resource for me when trying to discover my common triggers. Often, they are the same.
– Getting too little sleep. This is a big contributor to the onset of a migraine, and I know that if I have multiple nights of no sleep, a migraine is sure to follow. Sleep can be nearly impossible with little ones, but try to make it up where you can. Go to bed when your babies do, nap when they do too, or try to find some time during lunch breaks to just close your eyes and rest that poor brain.
– Having too much caffeine. Caffeine, our lifesaver in the morning or when we don’t get that beloved sleep, can also bring on a migraine faster. It constricts your blood vessels and increases your heart rate. It feels good in the moment, but can also make that incessant pounding worse. I finally kicked the coffee habit after many loving years with my darling java, but it has really helped. I still drink tea, a combination of black and green, so I still intake caffeine, but not at the same rate or in the same concentration.
– Not eating regularly, or drinking enough water. In combination with healthy sleep, migraine sufferers also benefit from eating at least every three hours, as well as drinking plenty of fluids (ideally water). The drop in blood sugar really affects those with migraines. Lacking these two essentials just adds fuel to the migraine fire.
– Menstrual cycle migraines. Some women find that the dips and dives in their hormones due to their period cause migraines to regularly occur. At least two moms I know have found that their menstrual cycle is the major contributor to their monthly migraine.
– An onslaught of stress. We all know that stress is unavoidable in our lives as moms, but an influx due to family problems, illnesses, financial worries, and more can add up fast. Taking a break with some relaxation or even a short meditation can help. It might not solve your problems, but can give you a little distance for a short while, and maybe keep that headache at bay.
– Red wine, some cheeses, dark chocolate. That just doesn’t seem fair, does it? All of those delicious foods can cause migraines? For some, yes. Red wine has been a culprit for a long time. Tannins and a substance called tyramine is supposed to contribute to those who are prone to migraines. The same goes for aged cheeses, they contain tyramine, which helps that headache along. Dark chocolate also contains it, and chocolate has caffeine from the higher content of cocoa. My aunt discovered that dark chocolate is her biggest trigger (along with caffeine,) so she avoids it completely.
– Food allergies or intolerance. Foods that your body cannot tolerate or has a reaction to will cause inflammation in your body. Inflammation can help that migraine come into being. After doing a food intolerance test, I discovered that I am intolerant to milk, lactose, cheese, and many types of seeds. I have completely cut those out of my diet and seen positive results.
– Weather changes. This trigger might seem a little silly, but it can be a contributor. Drops in the barometer mean changes in pressure, which can be painful to an already sensitive head. Major changes due to the changing of seasons affect my headaches, as well as visiting other places where the humidity is vastly different (like the southern states). There isn’t much that we can do about the weather! But being aware of it might cause you to not have that extra cup of coffee or stay up a little later.

How to help your head:
– Healthy lifestyle changes: do your best to get enough sleep, don’t overdo it on caffeine (or drink it at all if possible), always be aware of when you ate and when to eat again (do not go over three hours, carry snacks in your purse, always have water with you).
– Track your menstrual cycle along with your headaches. If you notice a pattern, avoid your other triggers when you know might start your period (or whenever headaches occur in your cycle). You also can visit your doctor to discuss trying birth control pills, which has helped those moms I know who get cycle-related migraines.
– Keep a headache log and note any patterns: did you have red wine the night before, what did you eat, did you get little sleep, are you particularly stressed, is your period coming or did it recently end? The goal is to narrow down any little pattern. That will help you untangle the triggers that bring migraines on.
– Get a food intolerance test. Knowing what foods your body reacts to can help your entire system (from your G.I. to your head). I had no clue that my body doesn’t tolerate milk products, and I’ve been eating them my entire life! You may not like the answers, but if you’re desperate for relief, you might be willing to try.
– See your doctor to get a prescription for migraine medication. There are options out there for us migraine sufferers and I have tried many of them. There are meds to take when a migraine starts to attack and there are some to take on a daily basis to ward them off. Choosing to take medication is personal and entirely up to you, but know that options exist, some of them might be helpful.
– See an acupuncturist who can get you back in balance. Acupuncture is beneficial for chronic pain or any other problem, which is often due to an imbalance somewhere in your body. The right acupuncturist can treat this imbalance, and in turn, alleviate some of your headaches, or make the pain less severe when they occur.

What worked for me:
First, please note that everyone is different and what has worked for me may not work you in the same way. Everyone’s migraine journey is unique; still, some of my solutions might help you too.
– Adequate sleep, eating healthily, and drinking lots of water. If I miss out on any of these, especially in combination, I’m in trouble.
– Exercising on a regular basis – it helps my body and brain, even short walks are something.
– Changing my daily diet. After getting the food intolerance test and cutting out my body’s major reactors, in my case, milk, lactose, many seeds, and some alcohol, I noticed a marked difference in my headaches. As a family we also cut out gluten (due to my daughter’s intolerance), and that has helped too.
– Acupuncture – it took me awhile to find the right practitioner (every acupuncturist has their own theory for your ailment, like a doctor), but once I did, she worked wonders in clearing out and detoxing my body and helping my energy level overall, especially my headaches. I went from having migraines a few times a month to having one sporadically every four or five months. She worked wonders for me, but again, everyone’s experience is different.
– Prescription migraine medication – I have tried a variety of these as well, some with varying success. In the end, I take a common medication (Imitrex) when I feel a migraine coming on. Since I have eliminated most triggers, that medication usually stops the migraine before ballooning into a full-blown attack. Prior to my lifestyle changes and acupuncture, the medication didn’t always work and I would take it much more frequently than I liked. Now, I am not waiting anxiously to fill my prescription.

The migraine problem is a hard one to solve, and it might be that you will always be prone to them, but know that you can cut out some of the major contributing factors and, if anything, reduce the times that you get them (and the severity). Good luck, migraine mamas!